Judging a Book by its Cover

Publishers frequently place enticing copy on the back cover of a book to draw the reader into the full text. My novel "The Reflection in the Mirror" will be published by New Harbor Publishing in the next few months. The following write-up is on its back cover. Hope it draws you into my latest romantic suspense novel .

"Martin Gilmore knows about the power of forgiveness. With help from family and friends, he transforms himself from an angry man, damaged by a childhood incident involving a teacher, to a new man experiencing joy for the first time in Christ’s redemption. That spiritual walk involves hard choices.

As a single dad to his two grown children who strives to achieve integrity in the workplace while dealing with his feelings for his fiancée, Linda, Martin knows the test of a refiner’s fire where life hangs in balance. So far, those experiences strengthened him. But will his trust in God last when he faces challenges?

When sixteen-year-old Simon enters the picture, Martin feels like he’s looking into a mirror and seeing his old flawed self all over again. The young runaway is a thief, a substance abuser, and a truant, who hates his missing father.

Simon’s unexpected kidnapping draws Martin into a dark, sinister world of illicit activities. Can he rescue Simon and his father? Can Martin finally overcome the smoldering embers of failure trying to reignite within him?"

Robert Parlante

April 2016

Where Did That Come From?

On February 2014 I posted my first blog. I thought it was worth re-posting because I frequently get questions about my blog domain title. Well here is the story once again! Where did SpaghettiManWrites come from?

The obvious connection is that it has something to do with being of Italian heritage. That’s partially correct, but there’s more. We all have a tendency to label people rather than try to know the person ___ now what label will you slap on me? Here are some personal observations to consider before you make your decision.

I am getting older, while my brain feels younger.

I’m an engineering person and a creative person. (Is that an oxymoron?)

I have had many failures that led to successes.

I believe Jesus is the Lord of my life, but there were times where I challenged that belief.

Went on a blind date only one time and met my wife who was a last minute substitute for someone who backed out.

Whatever label may have crossed your mind will never fully characterize who I am as a person because it would take so many labels. That’s how the moniker SpaghettiMan was birthed. Someone tried to affix a single label on me that turned out to be wrong. It all began 12 time zones away, near the Mongolian border of Siberia. I was in Krasnoyarsk as a member of a missionary team.

Not able to speak Russian, I was assigned a translator named Anne, an English teacher at the city university. She told me her father was Jewish. She was married to an Armenian and had one child.

I told her I was married with three children. That my mother’s family and my father came from northern Italy. That’s when I first noticed the cool shift in her conversation. Had I said something wrong? Maybe she didn’t understand me.

Nevertheless, through our week-long stay, we learned to work well together. Our first presentations were shaky and laughable. I talked too fast. She didn’t understand American idioms. Yet we learned to respect each other. More important, I sensed she was being touched by the gospel message as she translated the team testimonies.

At our last evening together Anne felt the need to be honest about her initial dim view of me. She related how she even told her husband that, of all the American missionaries in Siberia, she ended up with a spaghetti man! (In case it’s not obvious that was an ethnic slur.)

It seemed that in this distant part of Russia, a spaghetti-man label applied to Italian men is associated with laziness, stupidity, and sitting around all day drinking Chianti wine. My first reaction was anger. It was not so much a personal hurt, but the fact that she ___ like others ___ make sweeping characterizations.

When Anne saw none of the labels applied to me or the enthusiastic mission team, she asked for forgiveness. That was a big step for her.

As it turns out, the spaghetti-man label is not unique to Siberia. One definition in the current Urban Dictionary indicates it is a very thin, tall and bendy man. (I am short, dough-boy like and cannot touch my toes.) Another definition is an Italian male who is a hit with the ladies due to his diet of spaghetti and olive oil. I cannot wrap my head around how a spaghetti and olive oil diet translates to being a hit with the ladies.

Given the peculiar definitions, why then stick with a blog name including the reference to Spaghetti Man? It’s simple. I want it to be a reminder to me and the readers that we are always more than a single word or a dismissive phrase or an offensive slur.

Robert Parlante
April 2016
February 2014 (abbreviated)

The King's Speech

I loved the 2010 biographical movie “The King’s Speech” about King George VI struggling with stammering. The defining moment in the film was when the monarch delivered a radio address upon Great Britain's declaration of war against Nazi Germany in 1939. With the help of a voice coach the King overcomes his stammering. One report I read about the speech was that the King flubbed words beginning with “W”, despite the accolades he received for the speech at that dark moment in English history.

I related to the movie since it patterned some aspects of my own life. Through my childhood into high school I stammered. When called to read out loud in class I would scan the text quickly before I started , looking for words that began with “T” or “W”, because they were so difficult to say. No matter how hard I tried, I rarely succeeded. Fear would grip my throat like hands trying to choke me. I would do anything to not read out load.

Like King George I successfully overcame my speech impediment. Here’s how I did it. First, I noted I did not stammer when I was singing in school choir. I took voice lessons, not to sing, but to learn how to control breathing. I was inspired by the Greek orator Demosthenes who overcame a speech impediment. I thought if he could do it, I could do it!

Finally, I learned a principle of life that can be applied to any personal issue. Instead of avoiding what we fear, embrace the challenge. Ask the Lord to prepare a way for you to overcome, to strengthen you, and to walk with you.

If you have successfully overcome a fear, why not share that with me? I would like to post it on my blog and encourage others.

Robert Parlante